Franzibald Interviews Everyone In A Bar, About Himself

When word reached us that L.H. Franzibald was willing and ready to be interviewed, we jumped at the chance. We wanted to learn more about the man, how he can accomplish so much, and where he's planning on taking his legions of readers. A second note arrived from his publicist not too long after we agreed to meet with Franzibald, saying that L.H. would be interviewing himself, in a bar, at midnight, while wearing shades. We jumped at this opportunity, too. Enjoy.

-- The Editors

I. Rise to Fame

Franzibald: Hey, do you know who I am?

Bar Patroness: Um, no.

II. The Big Break

Franzibald: I can't believe I made it. Do you want to know how I made it?

Pool Player: How?

Franzibald: (Slaps himself high five)

III. Literary Hobnobbing

Franzibald: How many times do you think Robert Frost gave somebody the finger?

IV. His Masterpiece

Franzibald: I invented the middle finger!

V. Plans for the Future

Franzibald: Oh, toilet seat. My precious toilet seat.

Toilet: It's okay, Franzibald. Let it all up. Let it all up, baby.